Relationship Advice For When You’re The Only One Trying

You can fix relationship problems when you’re the only one trying, even when your partner doesn’t seem like changing.  There are several skills to help make this happen, and a great one to start with is the 4 Step Quick Change Method. This is How To Get Relationship Advice that makes a difference.

First Step:  Be specific about what you want to change.  What specifically would make the relationship better for you?  More quality time together?  More real communication?  Less conflict?

What’s important here is to be as specific and clear as you can be about the change you want to see.  That way, you’ll be more likely to get it.

The Second Step:  Make an intimate request of your mate, being as concrete as you can about the change you want.  Don’t say “We need to communicate better.”  That is too vague and doesn’t help your mate see what you specifically want. Good Relationship Advice can really help you make changes for the better.

Be much more specific by saying something like “Can we spend some quality time talking about our day after we get home from work?”  Make it very easy for your partner to see what you want them to do.

The Third Step:  You’ve made a specific request, so expect a specific answer.  Let your partner either say yes, no, or maybe.  Don’t let them ignore you.

Often times they will just say yes.  If it is a reasonable request, your partner will often want to make you happy by saying yes.  If they negotiate How about we talk about our day during dinner rather than right when we get home, thats fine, you want it to work for them.  If they say No, dont freak.

Step Four is how to deal with them if they say no to your request.  First off, you don’t need to start screaming or stalk off in frustration.  Often times it will be a delayed yes, they will just eventually start doing what you asked.

And sometimes, their no will be authentic, and then you need to honor it and make your own choices.  But if they say no, you can always ask again tomorrow or next week, if it is important to you don’t just accept the first no, ask again, this can help them get to yes.

Fixing relationship problems when you are the only one trying isn’t easy.  This tool will help.  You can make things better with a little of the right kind of focus and effort. You can get more help for relationships here.